Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Why do guys like 'Plain Janes'?

Lately we've noticed a dating trend. Guys seem to be attracted to 'Plain Janes'. Our definition of a Plain Jane: They have attractive features but they're not distinctive and they wouldn't stop traffic. They're pretty, but they're not anything special. They prefer flats to heels. And as for fashion - you wouldn't exactly call them a trend-setter. They like clothes, and attempt to follow fashion trends, but functionality always wins out over fashion and they opt for basic outfits. A fashionable person would cringe at what they wear.

Despite this, it seems they rack up more dates than Jennifer Aniston. Take this as a scenario: A group of girls head out to a nightclub for some drinking, dancing, and date possibilities. Half the girls have spent several hours that afternoon primping and preening to make themselves look gorgeous. They have done their hair, applied just the right amount of make-up, and are wearing something sexy but not slutty, edgy but not weird, and a hot pair of heels - they would have gotten inspiration from the latest Vogue magazine.
The other girls haven't spent as much time. They have tied their hair back in a ponytail, wear little or no make-up, and are wearing something frumpy that does little for their figure, doesn't match, and a "whatever" pair of flats - they probably picked an outfit from their wardrobe with their eyes closed.
All of the girls talk to at least one guy that night, and everyone feels that their conversations went well. But when they compare notes the next day, the only girls who have received texts from their potential men are the Plain Janes. We don't get it.

Magazines and television are bombarding us with images and advice of the best way to physically attract a man. They tell us that men like women who take pride in their appearance, who like to look pretty, and who go to a bit of effort to look good for a man. We have followed this advice for years but have come to realise that it's not true. If a man approached Plain Jane and Miranda-Kerr-look-alike (MKLA) in a nightclub, although he might spend the night talking to MKLA, it will be Plain Jane who has a date with this same guy next weekend. Why? Because whilst Plain Jane does not have the attractive edge, she does have the approachable edge. She's pretty without being "too beautiful", she's nonchalant about her appearance which shows she's laidback and not stuck up, she's physically well-proportioned and typical-looking which means there's no x-factor and therefore no characteristic that would make her seem weird - this means she's likeable and the type of girl you would definitely take home to Mum.

So, on second thought, perhaps the 'Plain Jane Syndrome' is not about physical attractiveness. It seems the rule is that if you want to merely attract a guy for a night, fashion and image are key. But if you want to score a date take a leaf out of Plain Jane's book and tone it down - WAAAYYY down!
Tips on how to 'Plain Jane' it:
- It seems that men DO NOT like headbands, high heels, maxi-dresses, oversized jewellery, high-waist (especially high-waist jeans), anything baggy (e.g. harem pants), most things 80's-inspired (particularly shoulder-pads and loose gym-wear), loudness (e.g. fur, feathers, sequins, crazy prints etc.) and anything else quirky that you think is cool, guess what? They will probably hate it.
- It seems that men DO like long, straight hair (with nothing special like fringes or layers), flat shoes, jeans (NO high-waist), plain cotton basics (e.g. singlets and t-shirts), a nice short-but-not-too-short summer dress, nothing-fancy shorts, dressing younger than your age, and alot of things that your fashionable friends would never wear themselves.

What does this mean for dating? If you care so much about getting a guy, then you should probably give the 'Plain Jane Syndrome' a go, and chances are it will work for you. We have many friends that are Plain Janes and we can see why men find them attractive, they're your typical, lovely girl next door.
But if you're a true fashionista and there's no way in hell you would sacrifice your love of clothes for the sake of a man, we say - GOOD FOR YOU! Because we are exactly the same, we know that men come and go but fashion is forever, even though it changes every season.

28 comments:

  1. Lol LOVE IT!!!

    It's soooo true!!!
    another A-mazing post!!!

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  2. I am a guy and often guys will 'target' the 'plain Janes' because a) they're the least threatening and more importantly b) they will - in theory - be much more flattered to be hit on, and therefore more receptive to the guy's approach. - Damo.

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    1. Why would she be flattered when every guy thinks like you? She's constantly approached. Your plans will eventually backfire. You want her because she's understated enough to never grab any attention away from you in any scene. Men are highly competitive with other men but especially other women. I call it selling out. Chances are your mother is basic too and you are unconsciously repeating a cycle put in place by your father's generations masculine toxicity. Got ya a good ol speaks when spoken too.

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  3. Thanks for your thoughts Damo, we agree. Definitely good to have a guy's perspective.

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  4. I sort of stumbled on this blog on a rainy Sunday morning.

    I think most guys prefer "plain janes" over more fashionable women because they seem more approachable and less high maintenance. After all, I think women who go all out getting dolled up for a night out do so as much for their friends and their competitors as they do for the men they are targeting.

    It's similar to how most women prefer the average guy over the flashy baller. The odds are better that the latter is full of himself.

    As long as a plain jane is pretty and at least shows at least some concern for her appearance, she will probably be approached by more men.

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  5. Hi, I just stumbled upon this page.
    I am a plain jane and honestly don't give a damn about how I look. I am not slim but I'm healthy, and sorta short. I wear zero make up except lip balm for my dry lips. I am no fashionista; I wear plain, comfortable dresses and take less than 10 minutes to dress up and tie my hair. I wear flats because I just can't walk in heels.
    Yet I noticed something. I get stares. Lots of them. Even from gorgeous, irresistible men. I don't understand why and I still can't put my finger on it.
    So my advice to the girls: Wear what you want and be who you are. Heck care what fashion magazines say. Eventually, it's your true self that will shine through.

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  6. Hmm. This is definitely a cultural thing, I think. In some places all the Plain Janes would never get looked at once, let alone twice. And they certainly would never be asked out or hit on. I'm glad that there are some places left on earth where I girl doesn't have to look like a super model just to get a modicum of attention. It's refreshing to hear. I just hope it's true.

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    1. Refresheling to know that striking women are still valued somewhere.

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  7. I am a plain woman who lives in a city with a greater number of women compared to men, of all ages and races. Unfortunately, in that situation, the only men who will pay attention to plain women are obese; drunk; or have a serious mental or physical disability. When I used to go out with friends to nightclubs, I hardly ever got asked to dance, or if I did, it was close to closing time.

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  8. Very high fashion gals can be intimidating. Flats are good because men generally prefer to feel taller. There's a happy medium in there somewhere. Men like short dresses or cleavage bearing tops, they will get you noticed. Some makeup is good. Girls who wear no makeup generally look a lot better when they put some makeup on

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  9. Plain girls dont have a king inside her guts..and dont think the world shuld knee for them..

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  10. Plain Janes have more confidence and are more secure with themselves. That's all there is to it. The woman who spends three hours getting dolled up to impress the world is not a secure person. The woman who throws on a t-shirt, pulls back her hair, forgets the make-up is the woman who walks out the door thinking ' I don't give a fuck what anyone thinks. I'm me!' Plus there is something bothersome with the way women have to validate themselves by their style. Is that all you got for the world? It's a myth if you think you will knock someone socks off every day of your life by your physical beauty. Time goes on and people, no matter how hard they try to fight it, clearly begin to age. And everyday, around every corner, there is someone ALWAYS younger AND prettier than you ready to steal your thunder. Do yourself a favor and stop ragging on Plain Janes. Whatever they have, you clearly haven't got. Get over it. You can always learn to be a little less shallow, a little more empathic and a little smarter.

    This is not rocket science.

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  11. I will take a cutie over a beauty every time. The more beautiful a woman is the more she is stuck on herself, more high maintenance, Is only interested in rich guys, constantly looking for guys that have more than the one she is with has and always comparing what she has to what other women have, always having guys hit on her even though the guys know she has a man. she's always flirting with other guys because she knows she can have them and has 3, 4 or more guys lined up waiting some where for her to get with when she gets bored with the one she has. You can't trust your so called friends around her alone. All her girlfriends that have lesser looks than her always want her to go out to meet other guys or use her to attract guys for them to jump on, the list goes on and on, they are just a broken heart waiting to happen. Who want that.

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    Replies
    1. Black and white thinking. A cover up to diguise your need to be superior than your selected mate. Men cannot experience feelings associated with intimacy while experiencing feeling associated with competition or frustration at the struggle of trying to process a more complex women. Very non-progressive...

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  12. itz true, i have seen MANY plain janes go on to become mothers. but honestly, they are the ugliest looking women around. i think men just want someone they can be safe and ordinary around. they dont want to end up wif a hot babe and have the girl cheat on them or have too much attention from other guys looking at their girl when they go out. so they pick a pigeon in the park-someone u cant be bothered to give a second glance. just makes me wonder wot turns them on in bed. if these guys are so easily ok with an ugly flat thing in bed, they might as well do it with a plank of wood with a hole cut in the middle. i think it just boils down to taste.
    coz guys like hot fast cars, the latest tech in games and all, n cheap junky meaty food, then y is it for girls, u prefer the least flavourful and attractive thing?? something not honest or rite about it. u want the plain jane but behind closed doors and at all times in ur head, u r thinking of that hot boobed girl.
    stupid men and ur poor taste!!!
    just becoz a girl is hot or isnt afraid to show it off, doesnt make her non-mother or gf material.

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  13. As much as I would like to be approached more, I am not straightening my naturally full and curly hair. Not because I don't like straight hair, but because it is extremely unhealthy for my hair. Why would you advise women to ruin their natural and healthy hair?

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  14. yea sure, the men I know love the bombshells, and want to date them. Men want a pretty wife, who they can look and show them off like a trophy, the plain Jane gets left behind. But make sure you have a house, not an apartment, and a big job, if not you fail. men want a place where they can sit down and watch TV and eat. I am the plain Jane and have been rejected so much I am giving up finding my prince.

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  15. The Plain Jane is a racist archetype. She must be white. Thus, white women are "good", marriage material, while colored women are "exotic" sexual objects who do not share in financial partnerships under this paradigm.

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  16. It is part of the marginalization of colored women. This can be measured through statistics on race, gender, single parent hood and poverty. Granted, there are other factors involved, but the "nice plain white girl" image should really go the way of history.

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  17. I have a strong preference for glam over plain. I think most men do as well but they choose plain over insecurity. I am so underwhelmed by plain girls that I would rather be alone than date one.

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  18. Gimme a girl that wears a distressed denim miniskirt, a simple red t shirt and a pair of flat sandals or flip flops and I'll cum like an elephant for her. So much sexier than a plastic barbie in a 500 dollar dress and louboutins.

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